It seems like every other week at my church I notice one of the head ushers go up to some random guy sitting in the pews asking him if he’d be willing to help pass the offering plate. Kudos to these guys who had no idea this was God’s calling on their lives for that morning. Unfortunately, for the rest of us, it’s not always a pretty sight. This one’s for you ad hoc usher man. LYLAB.
Oh, Ad hoc usher, we feel for you
as we watch you pass the plate.
The guy who bailed now burdens you
and has surely sealed your fate.
Your volunteerism we admire.
While sincere it may well be,
it lacks the time experience requires
to pass successfully.
Now, row by row you get behind
but you do not even notice.
The anxious thoughts within your mind
deter you from your focus.
The plate is given to our row
that has already been started.
We pass it to the next one, though,
once from us you’ve departed.
We understand. It’s not your fault.
We cannot make you a rusher.
You tried at least, this we’ll exalt.
You’re just an ad hoc usher.
I’ve been that guy! It’s scary!